20 Questions with Elliotte Friedman: On ‘lazy mouth,’ being late and deadline day (2024)

A few minutes before the appointed hour, Elliotte Friedman sent an apologetic message. He had a rich and admitted history of being late for things — for dinner with colleagues, for hosting a live radio show —and now he was running late for coffee.

Kelly Hrudey, his long-time co-worker at Hockey Night in Canada, has told him that being chronically late indicated a lack of respect for other peoples’ time. Friedman could understand why people felt that way, but he disagreed.

“I just get easily distracted,” he said, after arriving a few minutes past the 10-minute buffer. “My mind works 150 different ways at once, and I’m always late.”

In 1996, Friedman was working at The FAN 590 in Toronto when he was late for a fill-in shift as host of a phone-in show. The veteran host who stayed behind to control the microphone chided him on-air, in absentia, and the station issued a one-week suspension as punishment.

“There are people now who, when I’m late for anything, they just say, ‘Hey Elliotte, we’re going to suspend you for a week,’” Friedman said with a smile.

He chuckled: “Not one of my finer moments, but not something I’ve done a good enough job of correcting, either.”

There are also plenty of examples of the 49-year-old broadcaster being first to things. Friedman moved into television from radio, where he has evolved into one of the marquee NHL news-breakers and analysts at Sportsnet.

Friedman, a married father living in Toronto, is also quick to offer guidance to university students and younger colleagues who seek it. There might be a connection between that tendency and his tendency for tardiness —after finishing his coffee, he was stopped twice en route to his next destination, and he chatted with the people who recognized him.

In between all of that, Friedman took time out to field 20 Questions from The Athletic, talking about the trade deadline, peewee hockey heroics, and surviving online as a sports media celebrity.

1. Where did the extra “e” in Elliotte come from?

(Friedman smiles) I’m not really sure. I could see my parents wanting to be a little bit different. I didn’t know there was an extra ‘e.’ I remember that I had to apply for a passport in 1986 or ’87 — the first time I travelled overseas — and I didn’t have a birth certificate. I only had a birth registration. So we looked at my birth registration, and it had an ‘e’ on the end. And we were like: “What?” I had to go get the birth certificate. And when we gave them the registration form, I said, “I think the registration form is wrong, because it’s got an ‘e’ on the end of my name, and I don’t spell it with an ‘e.’” And they said, “No, you’ve been spelling your name wrong for 16 years.”

2. What did the Toronto radio executive mean when he said you had a “lazy mouth?”

That’s Nelson Millman, who was a hugely important person to my career. And he told me that, if I got tired or if I didn’t focus, I would slur my words, or trip over my tongue. It was a huge problem early in my career. For Nelson and the other people at The FAN, I owe them a lot for sticking with me, because at times I wasn’t very clear.

3. It is February 1996: Why is John Derringer griping about you on air at The FAN?

(smiles) That was my first real controversy. John was right. I was late. I have a big problem with lateness. Harry Neale used to call me “Five-to-Seven,” because I was always five-to-seven minutes late. Kelly Hrudey tore a strip off me in front of other people at the Turin Olympics because I showed up 15 minutes late for dinner, and everybody was waiting for me in the lobby. He destroyed me in front of everybody else. Later, Kelly apologized, and I said, “You have nothing to apologize for.”

4. You made $80 with your first paid shift at the station: What did you buy with the windfall?

I probably just threw it into my savings account. I didn’t have a lot of spending money then. (smiles)

5. What is the longest amount of time you spend apart from your phone during hockey season?

I spend way too much time on it. My wife will start talking to me and she’ll go, “You’re not even listening to what I’m saying.” It’s ridiculous. Right now, it’s a couple days before the trade deadline, so I’ll be constantly distracted by it. Whenever I retire — whenever that is — I’ll be gone. You will not find me on social media. My goal is that when I retire, I won’t even have a smart phone. I’ll have an old 1990s-style flip phone.

6. Give me the highlight of Elliotte Friedman’s hockey career.

I remember my first goal very clearly. I was skating to the front of the net. We had a really good guy on our team named Sean Atkins, who tragically passed away a couple of years ago. He was a professor at a university in Saskatchewan. It was house-league. Sean was a big guy. Really boisterous, funny guy, and he took a shot —he had a good shot — and he missed the net. It went behind the net and caromed right out front. I shot it in. It might have actually been the game-winning goal, too … I remember my first goal very clearly, because it took me a long time to score it.

7. You have said you quit at peewee: Why?

I sucked. I didn’t get better. You know what they say about youth, that it’s wasted on the young? It’s so true. There were so many things that I quit when I was younger. I quit playing piano. I wish I could play piano better now. I quit at hockey. I wish I did more. I quit at a lot of things when I was younger, and I really regret it.

8. What was the most competitive part of growing up with four siblings?

Before we moved into a bigger home, it was who got the bathroom and at what time. I’ll tell you a funny story. My sisters are pretty attractive. And people would see them and me and they’d be like, “what happened to you?”

9. You have said you have a bad temper: When was the last time you lost it?

(pauses three seconds) Yeah. (pauses three more seconds) If I’m upset about something I said on the air, it’s usually on the drive home. Really lost it? It’s been a while. But I get annoyed. (smiles)

10. You have worked with the NHL, MLB, NBA, CFL and Olympics: Which sport would you still like to try?

That’s a great question. I’m always looking for challenges. One of the real things I’m proudest of in my career was the first Olympics I did for CBC. They gave me table tennis, tennis, badminton and weight-lifting. I ended up doing nine sports at those Games. One night, they came to me — it was seven at night — and they said, “Elliotte, tomorrow morning’s schedule is really light, and we want you to do the women’s badminton final by yourself.” And it went pretty well. I like that.

11. Who was Mania Kay?

How long do you have? Mania Kay was my maternal grandmother. We were very close. She was stubborn. I’m very stubborn. I always say your best characteristic is probably your worst characteristic, and that’s the truth for both of us. She was born in Poland —I think she was actually born in the city of Auschwitz —and she survived the Warsaw Ghetto. She got married for the first time in the Warsaw Ghetto. I don’t know all the details. I don’t think he died in the Warsaw Ghetto Uprising, but he definitely died there. She survived. She didn’t like to talk about it a lot. I know she did some interviews, but with us, she didn’t talk about it a ton.

12. (quiet nod)

There were the two or three days over January 1945, when the Russians were advancing, and she was forced to walk for three days. And if you didn’t make it, they killed you. There were times in the war when she told people she didn’t think she could go another day, and people were like, “No, you have to.” She met my grandfather at Bergen-Belsen. They got married after the war. My mother was born in Germany in 1947. They moved to Canada.

13. What parts of her story did she tell you?

Bits and pieces. She never told me everything. She always said, “Never forget where you came from, because other people won’t let you forget it.” I think that’s important, especially with where we’re going now. If I asked, she would tell, but she wouldn’t go into a lot of it. She spoke at events and she was a big public speaker. I went once to see her talk. I went with her to see “Schindler’s List,” and there were things in that movie that I never realized. I asked if those things were true, and she said yes. There’s a scene where the kids hid in the toilets — they are covered in sh*t — and I asked if that happened. She said yes … I never wanted to be the one to force her to re-live those moments. I knew enough, but I didn’t always press for details.

14. Does that inform, in any way, how you might deal with the worst abuse you receive online today?

I don’t think one has anything to do with the other … You can’t let that affect you. You will paralyze yourself if you let all of those comments get to you. You can’t do it. It’s not healthy. I’ve had things like, “Every time I see you on TV, I wish Hitler had finished the job,” or, “You’re proof that any Jew can get any job, anywhere.” Or, “Get off my TV, you fat f*ck.” That stuff does not bother me. It does not bother me in the least. Plus, there’s a way you can mute offensive stuff. So I just did that.

15. Does the temperature online prevent you from discussing certain things?

Yeah. I think it does, and it doesn’t. It’s such a live wire, that you never know. I’ve written or said things before and I’m like, “OK, I’d better brace myself for the reaction.” And nothing happens. And I’ve said, “Aw, nobody’s going to care about this,” and it turns into a bomb. You never know what people are going to grab onto and turn into something. I think you have to be careful with that … I have a 10-second rule. If I do something that’s not work-related — it’s not a trade or anything like that — I look at it for 10 seconds and I say, “Is this still a good idea?” If yes, I’ll hit the tweet button. If not, I won’t do it.

16. What is the most stressful part of working NHL Trade Deadline Day?

Just not getting it wrong. The other day, I was fiddling around with my phone. I screen-grab fake accounts, because I want to see how people do them. So I ‘like’ them, then take a picture, and then I delete the like. I meant to hit like, and I hit retweet on a fake one. That’s stupid. And I was really mad at myself. That’s the kind of thing that you’re worried about: Don’t screw it up.

17. Sportsnet’s deadline team v. TSN: Who wins in a pick-up hockey game?

We added (Kevin) Bieksa and (Ryan) Kesler this year. And we’ve got (Bruce) Boudreau as a coach, so I like our chances. Put it this way: We have a handicap, and that’s me. But I’m a Sportsnet diehard, and they send me out there to do something stupid to (Ray) Ferraro, who loses his temper in the first three minutes. He spears me, he gets ejected. I say, that’s a good trade-off for us and we kill them.

18. Where is the strangest place you have been recognized by a Hockey Night viewer?

We were in Italy two summers ago, swimming in a rooftop pool, and somebody asked me, “Can I take a picture?” And my wife rolled her eyes: “That’s going to go right to your head.”

19. When was the last time you were starstruck?

That’s a great question. The one I remember is when the Major League Baseball All-Star Game was in Seattle. I was working for The Score, then. That would have been around 2000, and we were at the celebrity softball game. And I was pulling a total big-time move. I’m like, “I’m too big to interview celebrity softball players.” So someone else had to do the interviews. It’s so embarrassing now. I look back at my attitude toward that, and I’m like, “Who do you think you are?” I’m leaning against the dugout and I’m wearing my credential, and I get this tap on the shoulder. I turn and this woman says, “These fans want to get my autograph, can you help me with this?” It was Vanessa Williams. And I couldn’t even speak.

20. What will you do to celebrate your 50th birthday this fall?

I have five other friends, and we all turn 50 this year. We’re going to Vegas together at the end of August. I know that, on the day —it’s a Sunday this year —I’m good with my wife and son. We’ll do something together. I’m good with that.

(Top photo: Jeff Vinnick/NHLI via Getty Images)